~Friendship~
Monday, July 20, 2015
Friendship.
What does it mean in this world now?
Sometimes, I question myself.
Who are my true friends?
And who are the ones who are just leeching onto me?
Firstly, I'd like to apologise that recently, my posts have become a little emo.
I guess.
At this age of growing into a young adult, I tend to think of more serious things in life.
It gets difficult because everything seems so new to me.
Sometimes, I just yearn for people to be true to me.
Show me your real self.
Don't be a two-faced kind of person.
Because, I suck at judging people.
As I always believe there's a nice part in everyone. Pfft.
Be nice in front of me, but stab me in the back.
I guess, this is how the world is.
The battle of the survival.
Lost in humanities. Lost in moralities.
I guess, some people just wanna be close to you because, you bring benefits to them.
Yea. I guess that's how the real world is now.
People are selfish. People are heartless.
Nah. Who cares if you be mean to one another just to be successful nowadays?
The more cunning you are, the more successful you will be.
They think of themselves instead of helping each other out.
Even if it means their friendship is at stake.
Sometimes, I just wonder if their actions are true. Are they even sincere?
I miss how simple things were.
Pure, simple and sincere friendships.
Friends who accept each other's flaws.
Friends who stand by your side during good and bad times.
Friends who make you a better person.
Friends who point out your mistakes but never leave you.
And also the fact that nowadays, there are just so many fake people.
They act so nice in front of you. but, talk bad about you behind your back.
Well, if you really dislike that person, just stay away from him/her.
Why hurt him/her behind his/her back??
Don't act so fake and all. It's just so not cool. So insincere....
Is it really that easy to be nice to someone whom you just want to be friends with just to leech on his/her goodness but inside, you just don't get along well with or dislike that person?
Don't you find it hard to act nice when you're being insincere inside?
Have you ever thought about the other person's feelings?
Maybe, that's just how things work at this age now.
Well, I don't blame nnyone.
I guess that, we get corrupted day by day because of survival purpose.
And, I guess, I just have to change the way I live my life slightly..
Just to "fit" in.....
And move away from people who simply don't appreciate my assistance or help =)
I guess that's all for me.
I may be wrong ;D
Again, these are just my thoughts and I am just ranting about my disappointments =)
"Still fallin'"
6:48 PM
~Trust~
Friday, July 17, 2015
But are we all lost stars, trying to light up the dark?
"Adam Levine-Lost Stars"
Hiiii =P
Sorry for the scary picture ;D
Just wanted to remind you how I actually look hahahaha XD
So now, I am currently on my raya break. Not sure for how long.
Gotta see the progression of my project. Hrmm..
Two days have went by. Sigh.. Time does fly when you are back home. =(
Owh well. This is life...
Anyway. Many things have been happening in my life recently.
Haha. xD I'll be going for intern this coming September.
And owh well. I haven't received any news on any of the applications I have applied. Hmph.
This bothers me because I am running out of time day by day.
YET. I am doing nothing T_T
I guess I'll update about internship once I am being offered a placement =P
I just had three tests last week. It was a killer week. So many things due on that week. So little time D=
So sleep deprived........
It's always like that, isn't it?haha xD
So yea. Finally, I have a breather. But, not for long.
Once Raya break is over, there's gonna be a big war between me and tests, assignments, projects and finals. Yeahhh.. Come at me, bros!
Anyway, those are not the main points of this blog post.
Recently, well, not sure if I am just being sensitive when I am on my period.
But mehh. XD
Trust. hrm. Five-letter word. Difficult to build, easy to be broken.
I guess, trust is one of the most expensive gifts one could ever give or receive.
It can take years to earn but just a matter of seconds to lose.
Well, I wouldn't wanna jump into conclusion that someone has done it.
I chose not to believe it a 100% unless that someone were to open up to me.
But then again, it hurts a lot because, I've trusted that particular someone to never share whatever I've shared.
I hesitated at first to share because it seems wrong.
But I did.
Because, I put myself in that particular person's position.
When you yearn for answers, and you're just out of desperation.
And boy, was I wrong. I've trusted the wrong person.
Oh well. I guess, it was just bad luck for me to have bumped into such a difficult situation.
And for being a sucker at persuasion. pfft.
Of course I was freaking sad...
Because, I believed and trusted that person.....
So muchhhhhh...
I did not expect things to turn out like that.
And you just had to make me look like the bad person.
I am innocent, alright?
But no. You just had to push me to do something I was not willing to.
And I would feel guilty if I did not give in.
Because I have this freaking soft spot in my heart.
What's worse? I even dragged another person to sink with me.
What's going on in your mind?! Seriously...
What were you thinking?
Have you ever thought of others' feelings? Have you?
Sigh. I just don't know how to confront you.
Perhaps, I should just let things past.
And pretend, none of these have ever happened.
I know, it's nothing big.
But, I dunno. I felt that my dignity has been slightly ruined because of you.
I am not the kind of person the other party might think I am.
Thanks to you. I may seem like a b*tch to them =)
I ain't got time for your cheap dramas. Seriously.
Those stuffs. They don't even matter to me.
Because, I live my own life.
I ain't got time to butt into someone else's problems or dramas. Pfft.
Because, I know I am more matured than that.
To be honest, I don't know how to face you anymore.
Yea, I gotta say, things would be awkward between us.
Don't blame me if I am acting weird with your presence.
I did not ask for this. But, I am just a human after all.
I guess, it's best if I keep a safe distance with you.
Until, I found out what's the truth.
Sometimes, even if it hurts to keep a distance, but I guess, it's better to keep myself safe from unwanted attention or discrimination.
It takes time to build my trust on you again. It takes time.....A long time.
I guess, the world is a vicious place with the wrong companies =)
That's all I guess.
Cheers =)
" I'm gonna love you. Like I'm gonna lose you."
12:46 AM
